Today my mum bought me a new set of scented color markers from RoseArt and a pair of gold strappy sandals. Its my mum's birthday tomorrow. I haven't gotten her anything yet. I'll see what I can afford when we go out for the day.
Im 21 (soon 22), and its been blah. If you know what I mean.
I never have the right words so I'll have to borrow a little of Jeff Mangum www.neutralmilkhotel.org/faq.h…
to get me started:
"Hello everyone. I think its time that i made a few things clear. First of all, i am not in hiding, as some have said. where i am i supposed to be hiding?"
The last 3 months have been spent in some form of hibernation, true. But more importantly, I was working on getting back on my feet. This year was hard for me, and I've struggled a lot (with myself most of the time).
My cameras are gathering dust on the shelf. Sometimes, I think living behind the lens was an excuse I made for myself not to be present in the frame. And when I mull about it, I have been hiding behind my lens all this time.
I'm in the middle of relocating to another continent and getting a new day job. Make no mistake, Art is still my passion; I've only resigned myself to the fact that it is not my career -so I am focusing my energies on what puts food on the table (so to speak).
I wake up each day happy to be alive. This is why I know I should make haste and not waste my life away on inconsequential things.
Although, at some points in time, I have wished to have been more privileged in life I know for a fact that I have been immensely blessed. Surviving on Pure Grace. I am grateful for what I have and refuse to be a victim of circumstance. I will, in the end, live a life of my choosing. Lovesick or not.
I'm glad whoever you are out there enjoyed my art and took the time to share a few words or send me your thumbs up. Thank you for making your art, which has inspired me in my day to day life. Its time to move on though.
In parting, I leave you with Requiem savvychic.deviantart.com/art/R…
and Shade of Gray savvychic.deviantart.com/art/S…
; which posses perhaps the most clarity of self reflection I can ever have.
"Now i need to forget myself again, so you may not hear from me for awhile. Forgetting yourself is freedom, and i need to be free. Happy travels."
For now, this is it for
But now we must pick up every piece
Of the life we used to love
Just to keep ourselves
At least enough to carry on